Friday, August 21, 2009

5 Essentials to Keep Your Relationship Fresh

Here is an interesting article I found at Ezinearticles.com.




Relationship Help - 5 Essentials to Keep Your Relationship Fresh
By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Richard_Nicastro]Richard Nicastro

Anyone who is married or in a long-term committed relationship comes to realize that at some point there is a danger of falling into a lifeless routine. The vast number of marriage advice and relationship help books is a clear indication that couples are eagerly searching for ways to head off relationship problems and keep their relationship running on all cylinders.

Are marriage problems and painful relationship issues always inevitable?

Absolutely not-there are steps you can take today to prevent marital problems from taking hold and these steps can also help improve an already strong relationship.

Relationship help: 5 steps to a stronger relationship

1. Don't let frustrations mount

Fact: You're going to get frustrated with your spouse/partner from time to time-- you're only human, after all.

Trap to avoid: Too many couples let frustrations mount without clearing the air and addressing important issues. Unresolved issues have the tendency to fester and lead to bigger relationship problems-don't put your head in the sand and assume your marriage or relationship will take care of itself.

2. Validate each other


Fact: As your life becomes more and more hectic, it's easy to overlook each other.

Trap to avoid: Becoming temporarily preoccupied with competing commitments is one thing, taking the most important person in your life for granted is an entirely different ball game. Make an effort to check in with one another each day. Share the little things with your partner like you used to (when you first fell in love).

3. Don't let the negatives outweigh the positives


Fact: Conflicts and negative relationship patterns have a way of spiraling out of control if left unchecked

Trap to avoid: Research shows that for your relationship to remain healthy, there must be a greater number of positive interactions between you and your partner than negative ones. Make an effort to acknowledge and highlight any positives that occur between each other-and heap on the gratitude for the little things your partner does for you each day.

4. Make the effort to break up lifeless routines


Fact: Your relationship will fall into predictable patterns and routines.

Trap to avoid: Routines aren't inherently troublesome; in fact, many couples take comfort in their routines. However, continuously feeling bored and unenthusiastic about the time you spend together is a concern. If this is the case, the routines that once brought you comfort may be squeezing the life out of your marriage or relationship. You and your partner need to periodically infuse novelty into the relationship-stir things up by trying something new and exciting.

5. Find balance in your life

Fact: Taking care of yourself emotionally, physically and spiritually will help you be a better spouse/partner.

Trap to avoid: There are many different forms of self-neglect (working too much, repeatedly ignoring signs that you're not feeling well, consuming too much alcohol, not getting enough sleep...) that will adversely impact your ability to be a present, reliable and responsive spouse/partner. If you stop taking care of yourself, there will always be negative fallout for the people around you, especially the people who love you. Commit to taking care of yourself so you have the emotional reserves for yourself and the important people in your life.

If the idea of implementing all of these steps into your relationship feels too daunting, pick one or two and stay with them. Each one can make a positive impact on your relationship. And if your spouse/partner is open to it, share this list and make a mutual plan to incorporate these ideas into your daily lives.

Do you want to receive powerful relationship tips each month?

Visit [http://strengthenyourrelationship.com/relationship_newsletter.html]Relationship Toolbox Newsletter and sign up for Dr. Nicastro's FREE Newsletter.

As a bonus you will receive the popular free reports: "The four mindsets that can topple your relationship" and "Relationship self-defense: Control the way you argue before your arguments control you."

Are you ready to take your relationship to the next level?

I've just completed the newest [http://strengthenyourrelationship.com/relationship_store.html]Healthy Relationship Program e-workbook.

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a psychologist and relationship coach with fifteen years experience helping individuals and couples live more fulfilling lives.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Richard_Nicastro http://EzineArticles.com/?Relationship-Help---5-Essentials-to-Keep-Your-Relationship-Fresh&id=2781792
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Saturday, August 1, 2009

Are you really ready for marriage: Aug 1, 2009

Important questions to ask yourself or your partner before committing to marriage Things I Want My Daughter To Know: Aug 1, 2009

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Here is an interesting article on what people should consider before they get married. Sue

Question - Are You Really Ready For Marriage?
By Dave A Patrick

Are you really ready for marriage? What exactly does that question mean? Of course we're ready you might say. We love each other and we want to spend the rest of our lives together. OK, fine you love each and love is very important and it can transcend everything else but people can fall out of love very quickly.

There are other things that go to make a long and happy marriage. And it is important that each of you should ask each other the 5 essential questions below and listen very carefully to each others answers about how you truly FEEL.

#1 Children

Do you want to have children? If so, how do you want to bring them up?

#2 Religion

How strong are your beliefs, if any? How do you feel about church and church going?

3# Money

How do you feel about money? Are you a spender or a saver?

#4 Family

How do you really feel about each others families?

#5 Sex

How important do you feel sex is in a marriage?

There are many more questions you can ask each about subjects like what food do you really like? What's your favorite vacation or hobby or movie star? But asking the 5 questions above are essential, if you wish to live together in harmony for the rest of your lives.

Why, you might question, should knowing each others TRUE FEELINGS about the subjects above be essential to your marriage plans?

The answer is very simple: Children, Religious belief, Money, Family, and Sex are the BIGGEST CAUSES OF DIVORCE in the USA today. Almost 50% of marriages end in divorce these days and the problems that lead to divorce are usually caused by one or more of the subjects listed above . Relationship experts believe that if all couples planning to get married asked each other the five questions above before they tied the knot they could cut the chances of their marriage ending in divorce by half!

So to all you couples planning to get married, question each other carefully on the 5 subjects above BEFORE you make that final commitment to spending the rest of your lives together.

Dave A Patrick will have been married to his wonderful wife Janey for 39 years come September. He believes that communication with each other is the secret of a harmonious marriage. You can get a whole lot more information about the questions you should ask each other here:
http://www.squidoo.com/questions4couplesbe4marrage.

Article Source: ezinearticles.com expert=Dave_A_Patrick
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